#1 You Think You Are Superwoman Only to Be Constantly Reminded that You’re Not
When you’re raised thinking that you are solely responsible for making sure the rest of the world is happy, you don’t have the time to make sure that you are happy too. Realistically, even if you did, you wouldn’t have the energy. You’re so busy tending to everyone else’s needs that yours are always last on your to-do list, meaning that you never get to them.
One way to move beyond this cause of unhappiness is to let others be responsible for their own happiness, which they are, by the way. You aren’t doing them any favors by making their life easier all of the time. They have to learn their own lessons – just like you’ve had to.
#2 You Surround Yourself with the Wrong Type of People
Hang out with ‘life parasites’ and you’ll have the happiness sucked right out of your body like a vampire taking blood from their next victim. You know the type of people. They spend a majority of their time talking about how horrible their life is and blaming everyone else for their problems.
If this describes a lot of your friends, then it’s time to consider getting new ones. People’s attitudes rub off on you, so find people who are happy and content with life to spend time with and you will likely “catch” their happiness.
#3 You’re Too Hard on Yourself
Do you constantly belittle yourself and call yourself nasty names? If so, being hard on yourself isn’t doing you any favors when it comes to happiness. In fact, if you’re honest with yourself, then you also need to admit that it isn’t effective at helping you change either.
Being mean to yourself serves no useful purpose whatsoever and will steal your happiness quicker than a thief with a key to your house. Instead, give yourself a little leeway to screw up every now and then. Treat yourself the same way that you’d treat others – with kindness and understanding. You’ll notice a lighter, happier feeling when you do.
#4 You’re Not Doing What You Love
You can’t expect to spend all day at a job you hate and be happy at the same time. Or, if you have an untapped passion that you keep setting aside until you have the time or money to do it, of course you’re going to feel a little frustrated and resentful when that times never comes to pass.
You may not be able to quit your job right this moment and move into a new one, but you can start looking at your options and making a plan to make them work. If it is a hobby that you are passionate about that you’re not currently doing, it’s time to make it a priority. Do what you love and happiness will automatically follow you.
#5 You’re Not Focusing on the Right Things
Spend more time looking at where your life lacks versus where you are blessed and happiness will float away from you like a feather in the breeze. You’ll be so focused on finding everything in your life that is wrong, you don’t have the time to look for everything that is right.
Start each and every day thinking about all of the blessings in your life. If you have your health, be thankful. If you have enough money to provide for your family, be grateful. Concentrate on these types of things and you can’t help but be happy because you realize that you have so many things to be happy for.
#6 You’re Not Taking Care of Yourself Physically
Eat a diet that is loaded with not-good-for-you foods and spend all your free time on the couch and your happiness will be replaced with tight jeans and failing health. Part of having a positive attitude is taking care of yourself physically too.
This doesn’t mean that you can never have fun and enjoy a drink or a piece of cake, but if you spend 80% of your time eating healthy foods and getting in some physical activity, you’ll have a greater likelihood of changing your frown to a smile.
#7 You Don’t Feel As If You Deserve to Be Happy
This one is tough because either something happened in your life that has led you to believe you don’t have the right to be happy, or someone has convinced you that this is the case. Either way, it is wrong. You have just as much a right to be happy as everyone else, regardless of what did or did not happen in the past.
Think of it this way, if you were talking to a friend and they told you that they felt like they didn’t deserve to be happy, what would you say to them? You’d tell them that they do deserve to be happy, right? Well, now it is time to say that to yourself. Be your own friend for a change.
Do these seven things and you will change your question from “Why am I so unhappy?” to “Why am I so freakin’ happy?” That is a much better question, don’t you think?